Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(415): View more from California

This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations

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(443): View more from Maryland

i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list

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(407): View more from Florida

the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever

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(503): View more from Oregon

Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.

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(949): View more from California

So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card

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(573): View more from Missouri

So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?

(1-573): View more from Missouri

No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.

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