I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
