I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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