and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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