I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
