i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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