why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Randomize
