he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize