1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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