the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
