The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
