i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
