you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
