Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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