you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
