dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize