exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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