Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
