We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
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