I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize