I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
