so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
