A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize