I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Randomize
