so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
