She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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