oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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