So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
