Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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