In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
