boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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