Well douche your snatch and let's go!
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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