i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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