Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
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