What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
