he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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