why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
