What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
