too bad you live with your parents still
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Will exercising make me less horny?
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