I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
