Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
everyone is single if you try hard enough
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
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Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
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2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?