careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
