you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
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Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
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That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
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I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.