My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
