have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
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