Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
