if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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