Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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