he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
