I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
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Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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